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FOR THOSE WHO HAVE HEART DISEASE, PLZ REFRAME FROM READING THIS POSTING.
I WON'T HOLD RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY SIDE EFFECT CAUSED.

It has been awhile ever since i posted a blog in this dusty and yet filled with memories place...blog is really a wonder or i shud say; A pandora box full or uncertainties..why? coz u won't know what would u be typing out tml, day after or in the future...

The truth behind is scary...even i also fear of it but somehow someday it will be reveal and i thought that lying low and staying quiet for awhile can solidify me and let me open my eyes...but what i've been through is really indeed roller coaster feeling...

I've been asking myself this question:" What's Love?" not even to myself that i've asked, i even ask around and i've realise that i've been blinded by something...i realised that i actually wanted to "give love"...to "protect" to be like superman...these naiveness and stupidity which soon lead me to become a hypocrite...i really dunno wad i really want in the end...the a gal who i've known to almost 10yrs...redpanda, if u r viewing this, u shud know i've told u before...my life have been to satisfy others...but as for now, i've made a promise to myself that i need more time to search myself...my real self...( none of the gals that i've gone with is the one i really love...this is the truth ) XD

Just after my 23rd's birthday celebration, there's this annonymous gal whom i accepted her request to add me as a fren became boy gal fren within 24hrs...by the next last than 100hrs, we met and went to hotel 81 to have sex...when everything was done, i already know this is isn't something so called "Love" that i wanted i i'm deeply regretted by this incident but yet enjoying every moment...sex is really like a drug...once taken u can nvr really rehab over with...but be4 she knew it, adeline and i were already planning a perfect breakup which will happen on New Year eve...right now i couldn't even give a damn abt her already but there this guilt inside my heart and my unshaken heart was shaken...i'm on rehab now trying not to give a damn abt her though i know that i hurt this gal a lot...be it mentally or physically traumatise...all i can say is that she is not my type of gal...even it is, i'm not ready yet as in there's no Love in out r/s at all...i really feel like a brother to her...all though i fall for her for 5minute but in order not to hurt the both of us more, i choose to breakup with her...i cannot coz of sex and give in...

p.s

to this annonymous gal, ur name has being discreeted coz i dun wanna hurt u more...plz stay out of my life...once there's hate towards u within me, even a simple short sms i will feel irritated by it...so plz forget abt me...for the 100 buck that u owe me, u can keep the change...no matter what, life still goes on...

J.w

how long had it been? "boomz" lol dun learn from ppl...no no good~~ haha... had been drinking, singing and really nothing to do already... rather staying in camp for awhile and save some money... had been really spending money like water lol... bought a watch from Longines that cost a grand ! the price tag is like a note to let ppl know the police hot line haha... well... had been with around with adeline this pass few weeks... just hope she dun drink so much already... i'm at my limit! other thing than drinking is still ok... anyway i can drink quite a lot but not over my stomach limit that is... omg... my life is going to another chapter already... let see how things go bah...

i'm slowly, gradually but its for sure that i'm getting slimmer :) had been skipping meals which mean that i'm having irregular meals... though i know it is not good for my health but something junwei has to do things in an unorthodox way... ppl do desperate things when they are desperate... and ya... i'm giving up hope on baby le... hope she's fine by her own now...got to go soon... booking in le..nights everyone... though no body is going to view my blog but i just wanna say wad i feel and wanna say some time...

ever since 7th July 2010, 2054hrs

lots of things happen since last weekend and ya that is my camp... FUCKed up dog unit section zzz almost half of my dog sect got discipline problem... including me... stupid la i made a stupid mistake by asking de driver to drive me to my duty area to retrieve something end up kana fuck like one kind my our warrant officer lol he like really wanna punch ppl liao... i was like lol PUNCH MAN! i will then SUE U TO UR GRAVE LOL! it has been a gloomy week for all of us... haiz lets not talk abt the unhappy matter...

i think i'm getting older already coz my blog seems to be shorter and shorter... i had been helping my fren build his comp that cost 1.5k and he's very satisfied...

had been a "sleepy" week for me... i'm always feeling tired all day but night time very active lol due to me duty...

today went to my fren house to change new cpu cooler fan for him coz he's gonna spoil soon... literally no ball bearing liao.... he treat me lunch for helping him... wa kfc buddy meal... omg! i'm growing a bit too fat now LOL! haha nbm just give me another 3months to wakc myself haha!

reach home like 3 plus... weather was soo hot... i cannot take it and so i took cab home from tang jong ru... reach home watch d.gray man lol this anime is the one that sparks the catching of the piracy online phenomenom and yet i'm watching it online haha

ya O2jam is finally back online and i'm playing it now... trying to train back my skill haha octopus finger...lol

sian la now very shag...slpy but fren still asking me out... haiz... wad to do~!

junwei cannot like that... must wake up! LOL!

ever since 5th May 2010, 2021hrs

i'm blogging now is be coz i will be out later with guoz to some "siam tio" to drink... tonight is the night to enjoy and that mean that there will be quite a lot of things that need to be done will be delayed... i need to pack up my desktop files and download songs and do a final revision on my songs pack so as to ease up my future DJ dream and to make finding song convenient to me... why all the hussle? coz my current os kana the genuine counterfeit thingy zzz need to reinstall my os wa lan si buay ma fan leh but nvm... i just need to pack and then unpack later... ya yesterday went over to ck's place to do his computer and dunno wads going on... i was hoping that it is just graphic card problem but end up its something more and need his motherboard to be send over for service which i dunno how to... i can only do testing as i dun have the advance testing tool to do it for him so uh hmm! sorry ck, u got to wait awhile...

and to share a bit abt me, my so call "buddy" who used me like one idiot... all i can say is that it is an irreversable past and i dun want to hear any thing regarding to them anymore... enough is enough... its like as if i'm waiting for a little gal to grow up... sacrifice so much for her and yet she dun realise it... i even confess my feelings for her and she somehow reject it and i have to cover it up by saying that i'm joking zzz no want would ever know how i feel... even if there's one, i dun wish to think about it...

today morning wake up quite early to meet elroy go sengkang to play basketball... why sengkang? good question... coz there's gals that is why elroy willing to go so far to play basketball zzz and for me? i can go anywhere just to play basketball... the sun was so scorching that my foot gave way... coz i was wearing slippers to play LOL coz i got no sports shoes... need to buy one liao... was sitting there like coach like that lol... anyway i manage to play for like 2hrs plus until the sky finally rain... we quickly went to seek shelter at a nearby macdonald... had lunch there and we went home and elroy manage to get one of the gal's....erm ... hotmail instead of number LOL! haha think i'm gotta go already... before i go meet guoz i still need to go funan buy dvd to burn haiz... well blog next time chasss~~

ever since 25th April 2009, 1927hrs

its been a long time since i've last blog... 1 more month and a few days into another year of my NS life ever since my enlistment date... a year more to ORD... it has been my up and down this past year i've been through... i've seen my limit of my physical ability, i've been rich and now i've been reduced to nothing... well i guess god wanted to show me that i can actually do things out of my limit with my inner strenght but it is just that i'm kill by my own laziness... anyway lets talk about today haha...

just book out and went over to ck's house to troubleshoot his comp and lets just hope that its not really graphic card failure hmm then went home to prepare to go out again to meet ck... well gotta go now...

ever since 24th april, 1500hrs

wow...i last blog on 1st Dec and now already coming end of Dec and coming 2010 new year...well i'm going to be the COS tml and then the day after is count down of the new year and i'll be out to town yea! hehe but dun think got the money to enjoy anyway, its nothing new to me...every count down its just like the other day the day after and the eve it self its just as usual...its just that the streets is crowded with people and laughter everywhere...anyway i hope this coming 2010 will be my year coz 2009 is just a prologue year and 2010 mark the beginning...so wads gonna happen to me for the next 12months? haha dog, walking, dog and more walking and ... more DOGS! haha

well for u guys to know, i have spend around 2k to build my dream comp and i manage to get myself a psp and now i'm having fun with everything i've got but i won't stop here...for me, there's no stopping for the hunger for new things...to have a GF now is a big big no coz i'm now having fun :) having gf now is also a waste of my money and time... cant wait for my overseas plan... mid 2010 i will be going overseas with some of my frens to enjoy :)

yesterday went to some pub and hmm its quite an experience and i thought it out that its still better to club than pub...pub u have to spend minumum of 50 buck and some time even 100 buck one night there...but club, 20 - 30 buck is enough for everything include entrance fee and the cab fare...extra cash in club can buy u a pack of cigarette or any shots some more i can get to enjoy plus gals to see...bad things i just need to tried once and i wont do it again and thats my policy...

ah wadever...i'm going to town already i'm suppose to reach iluma at 8 but its going to 8 and i'm still at home haha! gotta' bounce see ya :P

Tuesday, 29th December 09
blog @ 1954hrs

its more than half a month since i last blog...just celebrated my birthday last week and ya...one step into another chapter of my life...but i will spend these meaningless days in my new sub unit emo all the way i guess...

my birthday is coming and yet its like just another simple day...if i could, i will turn back time and tell him/her that how special they are and to mane the mistake that i've made in the future which is the "today"...but well its too late now...its not the usual me anymore too...though i keep on saying that i'll do this and that but its like always end up swallowing back my own words and rot there...just when will i forget about going into a relationship... haiz zzz why must i keep on thinking about going into it?? why why why?? well if i know, i won't be here anymore i guess...and well i've just made myself a fool again...is love that so important?? why not money?? can someone tell me? though i know the answer on the surface but i just cant bare to admit the truth...still thinking that i owe ppl quite a lot of things and i have to return but the problem is...how to...*scratching head*...

my life will never be the same anymore...feeling fucking pain now...cant cure by just shouting but that would make me feel better just for awhile i guess...scratching my head or shag myself up but still...just for that moment i felt like peace...every part of my body is tingling...just couldn't calm myself down...i want to take every little thing i said and eat it back...i'm just feeling a bit tired...perhaps numb...

time fly pass fast as my 2 week dog handler course too...i'm just norminated as Best Trainee in Military Working Dog Unit under Military Police command cum Security Trooper sounds cool huh? lol...5 yrs dog handler and 5 yrs infantry for my reservice...and ya haha today i make my first live speech ever! very kan chiong lor haha most of them told me that my speech is so dead haha so am i......

well last week is cindy's sister's birthday and she treats me to karaoke at TopOne just behind bugis juntion...we k from 11pm to 5.30am in the morning lol ! and wad a coincidence la coz its like cindy is with her bf and her sister is with her bf too and siyi is single there and so erm lol...but well i diden even know whether she's single or not but i'm starting to have feelings for her erm just a little bit...manage to get her hp number through cindy which i feel not right and ya i did msg siyi but she nvr reply and so i gave up on her le till the next time we meet up then say bah...

now...problem had just befell on me...why always i had to go through this tough experiences...i thought that her "newly FOUND" bf WILL actually take care of her but he failed me...OUT OF JEALOUSY he scolded her and wanna break up with her well...though i haven gotten much news after that day i called her and she told me wad had happen but i have to feed my dog then half way through de call...i really could not take it anymore too...i've once told myself that if the next guy she had, did not even put in any effort, i will take care of her no matter what but this is not up to me to choose and i cant be selfish too but too bad that they diden know....but as for now i will see what i can do for her...she seems to be avoiding me but also seems not and yet normal...omg wads gal made of? haha funny question that i dun have to ask...i'm so stupid...

ah...i know why up till now i still feel like i've been tied down and just today i found a reason for me to let it go and i hope that this is for real...its easy to say but i guess i have to...haiz

today i have a ST(security trooper) event held at east coast BBQ! but dunno whether wanna go or not...coz i still need to flash my psp...sian alright i shall stop here haha! i thought that well i actually wanted to make this my last blog but haiz i couldn't bare...maybe when the day i really have no internet bah haha! tc login off~~till next time

Friday, 13th November 09
blog @ 2030hrs

FOR THOSE WHO HAVE HEART DISEASE, PLZ REFRAME FROM READING THIS POSTING.
I WON'T HOLD RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY SIDE EFFECT CAUSED.

It has been awhile ever since i posted a blog in this dusty and yet filled with memories place...blog is really a wonder or i shud say; A pandora box full or uncertainties..why? coz u won't know what would u be typing out tml, day after or in the future...

The truth behind is scary...even i also fear of it but somehow someday it will be reveal and i thought that lying low and staying quiet for awhile can solidify me and let me open my eyes...but what i've been through is really indeed roller coaster feeling...

I've been asking myself this question:" What's Love?" not even to myself that i've asked, i even ask around and i've realise that i've been blinded by something...i realised that i actually wanted to "give love"...to "protect" to be like superman...these naiveness and stupidity which soon lead me to become a hypocrite...i really dunno wad i really want in the end...the a gal who i've known to almost 10yrs...redpanda, if u r viewing this, u shud know i've told u before...my life have been to satisfy others...but as for now, i've made a promise to myself that i need more time to search myself...my real self...( none of the gals that i've gone with is the one i really love...this is the truth ) XD

Just after my 23rd's birthday celebration, there's this annonymous gal whom i accepted her request to add me as a fren became boy gal fren within 24hrs...by the next last than 100hrs, we met and went to hotel 81 to have sex...when everything was done, i already know this is isn't something so called "Love" that i wanted i i'm deeply regretted by this incident but yet enjoying every moment...sex is really like a drug...once taken u can nvr really rehab over with...but be4 she knew it, adeline and i were already planning a perfect breakup which will happen on New Year eve...right now i couldn't even give a damn abt her already but there this guilt inside my heart and my unshaken heart was shaken...i'm on rehab now trying not to give a damn abt her though i know that i hurt this gal a lot...be it mentally or physically traumatise...all i can say is that she is not my type of gal...even it is, i'm not ready yet as in there's no Love in out r/s at all...i really feel like a brother to her...all though i fall for her for 5minute but in order not to hurt the both of us more, i choose to breakup with her...i cannot coz of sex and give in...

p.s

to this annonymous gal, ur name has being discreeted coz i dun wanna hurt u more...plz stay out of my life...once there's hate towards u within me, even a simple short sms i will feel irritated by it...so plz forget abt me...for the 100 buck that u owe me, u can keep the change...no matter what, life still goes on...

J.w

how long had it been? "boomz" lol dun learn from ppl...no no good~~ haha... had been drinking, singing and really nothing to do already... rather staying in camp for awhile and save some money... had been really spending money like water lol... bought a watch from Longines that cost a grand ! the price tag is like a note to let ppl know the police hot line haha... well... had been with around with adeline this pass few weeks... just hope she dun drink so much already... i'm at my limit! other thing than drinking is still ok... anyway i can drink quite a lot but not over my stomach limit that is... omg... my life is going to another chapter already... let see how things go bah...

i'm slowly, gradually but its for sure that i'm getting slimmer :) had been skipping meals which mean that i'm having irregular meals... though i know it is not good for my health but something junwei has to do things in an unorthodox way... ppl do desperate things when they are desperate... and ya... i'm giving up hope on baby le... hope she's fine by her own now...got to go soon... booking in le..nights everyone... though no body is going to view my blog but i just wanna say wad i feel and wanna say some time...

ever since 7th July 2010, 2054hrs

lots of things happen since last weekend and ya that is my camp... FUCKed up dog unit section zzz almost half of my dog sect got discipline problem... including me... stupid la i made a stupid mistake by asking de driver to drive me to my duty area to retrieve something end up kana fuck like one kind my our warrant officer lol he like really wanna punch ppl liao... i was like lol PUNCH MAN! i will then SUE U TO UR GRAVE LOL! it has been a gloomy week for all of us... haiz lets not talk abt the unhappy matter...

i think i'm getting older already coz my blog seems to be shorter and shorter... i had been helping my fren build his comp that cost 1.5k and he's very satisfied...

had been a "sleepy" week for me... i'm always feeling tired all day but night time very active lol due to me duty...

today went to my fren house to change new cpu cooler fan for him coz he's gonna spoil soon... literally no ball bearing liao.... he treat me lunch for helping him... wa kfc buddy meal... omg! i'm growing a bit too fat now LOL! haha nbm just give me another 3months to wakc myself haha!

reach home like 3 plus... weather was soo hot... i cannot take it and so i took cab home from tang jong ru... reach home watch d.gray man lol this anime is the one that sparks the catching of the piracy online phenomenom and yet i'm watching it online haha

ya O2jam is finally back online and i'm playing it now... trying to train back my skill haha octopus finger...lol

sian la now very shag...slpy but fren still asking me out... haiz... wad to do~!

junwei cannot like that... must wake up! LOL!

ever since 5th May 2010, 2021hrs

i'm blogging now is be coz i will be out later with guoz to some "siam tio" to drink... tonight is the night to enjoy and that mean that there will be quite a lot of things that need to be done will be delayed... i need to pack up my desktop files and download songs and do a final revision on my songs pack so as to ease up my future DJ dream and to make finding song convenient to me... why all the hussle? coz my current os kana the genuine counterfeit thingy zzz need to reinstall my os wa lan si buay ma fan leh but nvm... i just need to pack and then unpack later... ya yesterday went over to ck's place to do his computer and dunno wads going on... i was hoping that it is just graphic card problem but end up its something more and need his motherboard to be send over for service which i dunno how to... i can only do testing as i dun have the advance testing tool to do it for him so uh hmm! sorry ck, u got to wait awhile...

and to share a bit abt me, my so call "buddy" who used me like one idiot... all i can say is that it is an irreversable past and i dun want to hear any thing regarding to them anymore... enough is enough... its like as if i'm waiting for a little gal to grow up... sacrifice so much for her and yet she dun realise it... i even confess my feelings for her and she somehow reject it and i have to cover it up by saying that i'm joking zzz no want would ever know how i feel... even if there's one, i dun wish to think about it...

today morning wake up quite early to meet elroy go sengkang to play basketball... why sengkang? good question... coz there's gals that is why elroy willing to go so far to play basketball zzz and for me? i can go anywhere just to play basketball... the sun was so scorching that my foot gave way... coz i was wearing slippers to play LOL coz i got no sports shoes... need to buy one liao... was sitting there like coach like that lol... anyway i manage to play for like 2hrs plus until the sky finally rain... we quickly went to seek shelter at a nearby macdonald... had lunch there and we went home and elroy manage to get one of the gal's....erm ... hotmail instead of number LOL! haha think i'm gotta go already... before i go meet guoz i still need to go funan buy dvd to burn haiz... well blog next time chasss~~

ever since 25th April 2009, 1927hrs

its been a long time since i've last blog... 1 more month and a few days into another year of my NS life ever since my enlistment date... a year more to ORD... it has been my up and down this past year i've been through... i've seen my limit of my physical ability, i've been rich and now i've been reduced to nothing... well i guess god wanted to show me that i can actually do things out of my limit with my inner strenght but it is just that i'm kill by my own laziness... anyway lets talk about today haha...

just book out and went over to ck's house to troubleshoot his comp and lets just hope that its not really graphic card failure hmm then went home to prepare to go out again to meet ck... well gotta go now...

ever since 24th april, 1500hrs

wow...i last blog on 1st Dec and now already coming end of Dec and coming 2010 new year...well i'm going to be the COS tml and then the day after is count down of the new year and i'll be out to town yea! hehe but dun think got the money to enjoy anyway, its nothing new to me...every count down its just like the other day the day after and the eve it self its just as usual...its just that the streets is crowded with people and laughter everywhere...anyway i hope this coming 2010 will be my year coz 2009 is just a prologue year and 2010 mark the beginning...so wads gonna happen to me for the next 12months? haha dog, walking, dog and more walking and ... more DOGS! haha

well for u guys to know, i have spend around 2k to build my dream comp and i manage to get myself a psp and now i'm having fun with everything i've got but i won't stop here...for me, there's no stopping for the hunger for new things...to have a GF now is a big big no coz i'm now having fun :) having gf now is also a waste of my money and time... cant wait for my overseas plan... mid 2010 i will be going overseas with some of my frens to enjoy :)

yesterday went to some pub and hmm its quite an experience and i thought it out that its still better to club than pub...pub u have to spend minumum of 50 buck and some time even 100 buck one night there...but club, 20 - 30 buck is enough for everything include entrance fee and the cab fare...extra cash in club can buy u a pack of cigarette or any shots some more i can get to enjoy plus gals to see...bad things i just need to tried once and i wont do it again and thats my policy...

ah wadever...i'm going to town already i'm suppose to reach iluma at 8 but its going to 8 and i'm still at home haha! gotta' bounce see ya :P

Tuesday, 29th December 09
blog @ 1954hrs

its more than half a month since i last blog...just celebrated my birthday last week and ya...one step into another chapter of my life...but i will spend these meaningless days in my new sub unit emo all the way i guess...

my birthday is coming and yet its like just another simple day...if i could, i will turn back time and tell him/her that how special they are and to mane the mistake that i've made in the future which is the "today"...but well its too late now...its not the usual me anymore too...though i keep on saying that i'll do this and that but its like always end up swallowing back my own words and rot there...just when will i forget about going into a relationship... haiz zzz why must i keep on thinking about going into it?? why why why?? well if i know, i won't be here anymore i guess...and well i've just made myself a fool again...is love that so important?? why not money?? can someone tell me? though i know the answer on the surface but i just cant bare to admit the truth...still thinking that i owe ppl quite a lot of things and i have to return but the problem is...how to...*scratching head*...

my life will never be the same anymore...feeling fucking pain now...cant cure by just shouting but that would make me feel better just for awhile i guess...scratching my head or shag myself up but still...just for that moment i felt like peace...every part of my body is tingling...just couldn't calm myself down...i want to take every little thing i said and eat it back...i'm just feeling a bit tired...perhaps numb...

time fly pass fast as my 2 week dog handler course too...i'm just norminated as Best Trainee in Military Working Dog Unit under Military Police command cum Security Trooper sounds cool huh? lol...5 yrs dog handler and 5 yrs infantry for my reservice...and ya haha today i make my first live speech ever! very kan chiong lor haha most of them told me that my speech is so dead haha so am i......

well last week is cindy's sister's birthday and she treats me to karaoke at TopOne just behind bugis juntion...we k from 11pm to 5.30am in the morning lol ! and wad a coincidence la coz its like cindy is with her bf and her sister is with her bf too and siyi is single there and so erm lol...but well i diden even know whether she's single or not but i'm starting to have feelings for her erm just a little bit...manage to get her hp number through cindy which i feel not right and ya i did msg siyi but she nvr reply and so i gave up on her le till the next time we meet up then say bah...

now...problem had just befell on me...why always i had to go through this tough experiences...i thought that her "newly FOUND" bf WILL actually take care of her but he failed me...OUT OF JEALOUSY he scolded her and wanna break up with her well...though i haven gotten much news after that day i called her and she told me wad had happen but i have to feed my dog then half way through de call...i really could not take it anymore too...i've once told myself that if the next guy she had, did not even put in any effort, i will take care of her no matter what but this is not up to me to choose and i cant be selfish too but too bad that they diden know....but as for now i will see what i can do for her...she seems to be avoiding me but also seems not and yet normal...omg wads gal made of? haha funny question that i dun have to ask...i'm so stupid...

ah...i know why up till now i still feel like i've been tied down and just today i found a reason for me to let it go and i hope that this is for real...its easy to say but i guess i have to...haiz

today i have a ST(security trooper) event held at east coast BBQ! but dunno whether wanna go or not...coz i still need to flash my psp...sian alright i shall stop here haha! i thought that well i actually wanted to make this my last blog but haiz i couldn't bare...maybe when the day i really have no internet bah haha! tc login off~~till next time

Friday, 13th November 09
blog @ 2030hrs